The week where everything becomes official

It’s safe to say I never thought I’d be able to get engaged to T, I thought we’d elope somewhere and figure it out as we go. Even when my mom got on board this year I thought something would inevitably happen to change her mind. Her mind did change but not in the way I or anyone expected, her willingness to accept others has grown so much and I’m so grateful for that. Sure she’s religious, has trouble pronouncing some english words and is kinda cooky but she’s my mom and I wouldn’t trade that for anything.

I told my parents they were my best friends and both of them just about melted. In the span of a year, I’ve gone from being so distant and disconnected from them to being joined at the hip. Making the step to let them into my personal life made a world of a difference. Getting here wasn’t easy but it was so incredibly worth it. Speaking of parents, my dad made a pretty important phone call a couple weeks ago. He called T’s mom and officially invited their family over for the engagement which is in approximately 5 days 4 hours and 37 minutes (can’t you tell I’m not excited at all?)

There’s a lot of confusion with this whole “formal engagement” set up for me. Everyone gets gifts, I get a ring and we eat. It sounds simple but feels far from it. The plan is that we’ll do the gift and ring exchange at the house and then we’ll go out to dinner to celebrate. This whole thing sounds so awkward. In fact, I remember it being very very awkward when my sister and brother had to go through with it for their spouses. In addition to the unavoidable awkwardness, part of me is wondering if things like a ‘mehr’ (dowry) will be discussed, if we’ll talk about the wedding, if getting gifts for everyone is even really necessary (my dad said no and my mom said yes, so obviously I got a very clear answer). T’s grandparents will be there too, as well as my uncle and maybe some extended family as well. When I originally pictured this formal engagement I saw only our nuclear families coming together but it’s morphed into a bigger get together than I originally thought. My sister told me to get used to it now because planning the wedding is going to go the same way.

Speaking of my sister, she’s having a little girl! This is a HUGE surprise considering her doctor said that it was a boy. Somehow information got communicated incorrectly and ‘he’ was actually a ‘she’ all along. However, the best-aunt-ever (me) already planned an amazing baby shower…for a boy, but this is a welcome shock because all we want is a happy healthy baby, so I’ll just have to start from scratch with the baby shower. Oh well, baby girls are more fun anyways, cue the tutus and bows!


Float on,
Rosh

P.S. -Tyler did pull off the surprise, more details on that next week 😉

Leaps and Bounds

It’s been months since I last posted but so much has happened and I finally have a chance to catch up. Every part of life is changing for the better.

I ended up quitting my job last month. I was on the fence about leaving my career but a round of bad food poisoning pushed me over the edge, as soon as I got discharged from the hospital I put in my two weeks notice. Obviously it was not fun but realizing that I could not even go home to feel better was terrible. I felt so disappointed in myself for quitting, I love working and not having another job lined up made me feel like I jumped the gun on leaving. Over the course of 2 months I had applied for 117 jobs.  After the 115th application I stopped applying because I realized I was being a little crazy and going for anything I thought I qualified for. Instead, I decided get very picky about what I wanted with my career, one thing I knew though was that it had to be close to home. Home meant moving back in with my parents, which i was actually excited for. Once I stopped losing my mind I ended up getting a great job with a company I can see myself with for a long time. The position is 10% travel instead of 100%, so I still get some travel perks which is nice.

Coming back home was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. As I’ve gotten a little older I’ve realized that my parents are loving, generous, strong and wise creatures. It took me leaving home, traveling for a while and being independent to realize how amazing parents are. So yes, I’m in my 20’s and I live with them but I would not have it any other way. It’s a beautiful thing to wakeup in the morning and hangout with them before the day starts, a lot of people would kill for that time with their parents.

Our family dynamic has changed a lot in the past few months. This is mainly because my older sister and her husband of 7 years are finally expecting their first child. They were trying for quite some time to get pregnant so all of us are very excited and thanking God for such a blessing. This baby has shifted the waters for Tyler and I in a very good way. We were hoping that we could get engaged this year.  We planned out some baby steps, having things sprinkled throughout the year so my family, mostly my mom, could get to know him better. That plan didn’t actually play out like we thought it would…

Instead, my sister was in town for a week and had a pretty lengthy discussion with my parents, I’m not really sure what was said but whatever it was, flipped a switch with my mom. My mom decided that when we host my sister’s baby shower next month, we would also do a formal engagement between Ty and I.  In our culture, we have a formal engagement instead of a surprise proposal which is typical of american culture. What happens is the boy’s family comes to the girl’s house and his family asks for her hand in marriage. The girl’s family responds (hopefully with a ‘yes’ since it’s planned out), and the boy presents his bride-to-be with a ring. Gifts are exchanged between the families, photos are taken and it’s a happy time for everyone. However, I grew up in America so this isn’t exactly how I envisioned getting engaged, to be honest. I’m so insanely thankful that we’re moving forward, especially since we’ve been waiting so long, but I do hope T pulls off a surprise proposal  before or after the formal one. The plan is to get engaged and married early next year, which is easier said than done. It’s going to be a crazy 9 months trying to figure out how exactly we’re going to do the wedding while still being respectful of both cultures coming together. IT’S SO CRAZY. It is just nuts. It is absolutely bananas. Bananas and nuts. I don’t really understand how it all happened. What we’ve waited years for is finally happening and we’re so ready for it.

I started this blog for a variety of reasons: I wanted to document my post-graduation-big-girl-job-traveling-the-world life but I also wanted to have an outlet for what T and I were going through, incase there was someone out there going through a similar thing. Future posts will probably revolve around how we’re combining out cultures for a fusion wedding or the process in general and the highs and lows around our union.


Float on!

-Rosh

On the Road Again

At least once a week I wake up in the middle of the night with a minor freak out because my body has no idea where I am and what time zone I’m in. It takes me a minute to gauge my surroundings and calm back down. This week I shot up at 3 A.M repeatedly mumbling “where am I?”. Turns out, I was in good ole Omaha for my brother’s dental school graduation. I came straight from a client in San Bernardino, California. San Bernardino is smaller than I thought it would be. I’m not sure how people live, work and raise families here because it seems pretty dangerous without much to offer. A lot of people I’ve come across commute up to two hours each day from larger surrounding cities.

Needless to say, I don’t have any fun travel tips for SB. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t looking for another job, ‘looking’ may even be an understatement. I can’t sustain this road life, it definitely impacts my mental and physical health (it’s impossible to eat wholesome food with this schedule). Lately, there’s even more of a motivation to get back home, my family lives there but also, T just bought an amazing condo. We can’t live together until we’re married but we’re on our way there, at this point I just need to ditch the night terrors and feel settled.

It’s frustrating because I’m constantly taking phone interviews and if I can’t call in “sick” to work to fly to STL for an in-person interview, I’ll do a skype interview, and despite the efforts nothing has come from it. Applying for jobs should be a full time job itself. At this point, I just might have the drive I need to start my own business. I’ve been working on an idea for the past couple months and it’s gotten to the point where I need to put my money towards it to move forward. I don’t know if I’m ready for that leap of faith. It feels like I have three jobs between my actual job, applying for a new one and then also working on this idea. Hopefully something great comes from one of these, only time will tell.

I noticed that I’m constantly surrounded by success. After all, it is the season of graduations, weddings, moving and new chapters. My family and friends are kicking ass; some are focusing on family, improving their health, making money, going to school and overall hustlin’ to get their goals accomplished. The success is inspiring and pushes me to try to keep up somehow.


Float on!

Rosh